I got a new house for $350!

My husband and I used to watch a show called “Tiny House Hunters”. The show followed people who decided they were ready to downsize to a minimalist lifestyle. A realtor would show them “tiny” houses. Typically, these houses were around 500 square feet. The couple would see three tiny houses, houses to their specifications, and invariably, at the end of each house, the couple would share a look and then tell the realtor something to the effect of, “it just feels too small.”  We would laugh at this every time.

We live in a small house. Not a “tiny” house by any means, but it’s small. We have two bedrooms and one bathroom, condensed into 800 square feet. To make our house feel even smaller, it is filled with two adults, a baby, and two dogs. 

For the last several months, we’ve been utilizing the space poorly. In August, we loaned our couch to my mother-in-law to use in staging a house and conveniently were able to leave it with her. Our couch had essentially become a dog bed, and we never wanted to sit on it because it was covered in hair and felt frumpy. The rug, which we once loved, had seen better days. Its colors, bold, but moody, made the whole room feel dark and the dog hair was always in a layer on top of it. If we were to vacuum the house daily it might have been okay, but let’s be real, it’s hard to keep up with that. The rug was also flatwoven, which essentially meant that it never stayed in place and was often moved by the foot traffic in the living room and the dogs attempting to find a comfy spot. 

Without a couch and with the dark, almost bachelor, vibes, the living room was not an inviting space. And despite being a full 1/3 of the space in our home, we weren’t using it. We justified the lack of functionality by saying it was more space for the baby to crawl around, but really, the baby didn’t even want to be in the living room. Nightly, after putting our son to sleep, around 6:00pm, we would retreat to our bed where we would watch shows on the iPad, work from our computers, or read. On a more adventurous night, we might sit at the dining room table a little longer before retreating to our bedroom to put our feet up.

We made our 800 square foot home feel more like one of those tiny houses we saw on tv and we kept saying, “it just feels a little too small.” On multiple occasions, while we sat in bed at 6:00pm hunched over the 8 inch iPad screen, my husband would proclaim, “we need more space!” Over these past few months, we considered moving multiple times. 

Finally, last week, we went to the store and bought a new rug. It’s a high pile, light colored rug. Because of its pile and heft, it stays perfectly in place. The rug pattern hides all the hair (not in a gross way, I promise). Its light color brightens up the whole room. We even took our old couch back, which seems to have been given new life by way of the refreshed rug. The previous heavy-feeling, dark furniture looks great against the light rug and creates a lovely contrast. We even pulled out our dusty television and placed it on top of our credenza. We now spend the evenings relaxing in the living room, and only retreat to our bed once we are done relaxing in the living room. Our house feels back to its 800 square foot size and so much more enjoyable. 

So, what’s this long story about our house and new rug to say? Sometimes we confuse what we need and thereby rationalize our choices. What my family needed was to make our space more livable - not a new house. 

I see this rationalizing happen all the time. We might think we need a truck for that once-a-year snowstorm or weekend furniture move. We justify buying (and financing) a $40,000 car because it’s “safe”. We say that we need the leather seats because they will be easier to wipe off. 

What if we reframe what we think we need? What if instead of thinking we need a particular car, we reframe it to, “I need a mode of transportation to get from A to B. How best do I get that?” Rather than buying a truck, we might be able to rent one for the unique times we need one.  There are plenty of safe and durable cars on the market that don’t set you back $40,000. Leather seats don’t help you get from A to B.  

We must be mindful of our justifications for things. Oftentimes we take a position because we are frustrated with our situation, but the position does not necessarily reflect our actual interest. A car is a big example, but it happens in smaller circumstances, too. We buy a new outfit or shoes for a one-time event; buy outdoor seating for the one summer party we’re having. Don’t get me started on what we rationalize we need for our children! We don’t always need what we think, or what we rationalize. If we reframe the need, or improve the thing that isn’t working for us, we can end up with what we actually want in a way that might actually make us happier and maintain our financial wellbeing.

A few months ago, we found a larger house in a neighborhood we loved. It checked so many of our proverbial boxes. It was bigger, on a large parcel, and underneath beautiful old cottonwood trees. The neighborhood was near our child’s daycare and a short commute to our jobs. It was a fixer upper - something we are excited about. We rationalized, “this could be our forever home”  (P.S. I already knew this wasn't going to be true - I have a dream forever home, and this wasn't it!).

Buying this house would have tripled our current mortgage payment. With our two jobs, we could afford this larger mortgage payment. When we plugged the numbers into the Bottomline framework, we realized it removed the option to not have one of our incomes. The option to live on one income is a choice we have really valued and knew we wanted to keep available. Because of that, we decided we didn’t want the house. I left my job (our second income) just a couple of months later. I would not have been able to make such a choice had we purchased the bigger home. 

For us, looking at our current home through the Bottomline framework made us realize what was important. We were able to rethink our space and make it more useful and comfortable. We found a different way from A to B. For $350, the price of our new rug, we were able to get the feeling of an entirely new house.  Plus, we didn’t have to move!

Is there something that you think you need, but if you reframe the need, you might find a different solution that leaves you better off?