Using your money to identify your values.

I often start work with new clients with identifying what they value. Ideally, our budgets are based on our values and goals. Some clients have a lot of clarity around their own values and goals right away. Maybe they have a goal in mind from the outset or have a clear focus on why they want to improve their relationship with money. Others, less so. In a world where we so often look through the lens of others, it can be challenging to know what we value. We might value family time, alone time, exercise, traveling, fashion, and the list goes on. Sometimes, values can conflict or clash with each other. Sometimes, it’s hard to articulate what it is we value or what goals we have.

I heard something on a podcast this weekend that I have been reflecting on. The speaker said something to this effect: “To learn about money, you must forget about money.” He went on to explain that we must focus on what we care about first and then our relationship with money will improve with that clarity. 

Through my work with our finances, I found that a way to “forget money”, was to look at our spending to get clarity on what it is that we value. When we started our journey, I didn’t know what I valued. For most of my life, I focused on earning money. I chose a career where I thought that would happen. Only later did I learn that I didn’t have a necessary fulfillment that mattered to me. 

By paying attention to how we use our money, my values and goals have become abundantly clear. How we use our money represents what we care about. When I’m reviewing our spending and I notice that we’re buying things that don’t bring us joy or enhance our lives, I gain clarity on what does bring us joy and enhances our lives. 

Last year, I left my salaried job to stay home with our child. Our value was to have him home with a parent. This value was greater to us than the income we gave up. We were able to see this when we looked at how we used our money in our budget, and we could make this decision. 

I encourage you to look at your spending over the past 30 days. Look at the purchases and for each purchase, ask yourself, did this bring me joy or enhance my life? Did this expenditure align with a value? Can I identify what I value based on my spending? If, for example, you see that 30% of your income goes to one thing, confirm for yourself that is where you want it to be going. When we see our money as a finite resource, and each thing we use it for takes away from something else we could use it for, it helps us clarify what our values and goals are.