Wonder and awe.
The best part about being a stay-at-home mom is that I get to wear sweatpants, never put on makeup, and lounge around drinking coffee and sparkling water all day. Okay, I’m kidding. Although I do all those things most days, it is never glamorous like social media would make it look for stay-at-home moms.
Before having our son, I could never have imagined what it would be like having a child, let alone having the privilege to stay home with him. When he was about nine months old and I was still working in an office as an attorney, I told his daycare’s director that I could never be a stay-at-home parent. I heard being a parent summed up like this: it is both the most boring and, at the same time, most exhausting job you could ever have. Yes, reading “That’s Not My Pig” for the hundredth time can get a little tedious. And by the end of the day, you’re wiped out. But being a parent has turned out to be the coolest experience in the world.
As adults, we have so little, if any, memory of being a child. We don’t remember what the world looked like to us at a toddler’s age. Looking at the world through the lens of my son gives me an entirely new perspective. He is not dazzled by new toys, he doesn’t want to eat out, he doesn’t have unreasonable requests. His needs are simple. He wants quality time, he wants to feel love, and he wants to explore. His desire to learn and his ability to keep going even though it is all challenging is incredible and inspiring. Walking is hard. Falling is hard. Learning to talk is hard. Not being understood is hard. Yet every day, he wakes up with a fresh start, a smile on his face, and he tries it all again. He does it with such joy and enthusiasm. I am in absolute awe watching him grow, change, learn, and develop.
I received a newsletter in my inbox from a brilliant author, James Clear. His weekly email poses one question to consider. In this week’s email he asks,
“When was the last time you felt a sense of wonder and awe? What can that experience teach you about how to spend your time?”
As the universe does, it planted this question in front of me at the exact right moment. A moment when I needed to reflect on this question. There are times that I feel frustration that I am spending my day being a parent and not working, not growing a business, not earning a full-time income, not engaging in adult conversations, not accomplishing enough to feel productive. But when I stop and think about his question, the answer for me is clear and resounding. Watching my child grow leaves me with a sense of wonder and awe every day. This is how I want to spend my time. This is a choice I get to make.
I share this because oftentimes we don’t do enough of, or appreciate, the things that truly bring us wonder and awe. It might be the simplest things, things that don’t cost any money, that don’t bring with them any notoriety or acknowledgement, or that can easily be shared with others. We might not do these things because we’re compelled to do other things – other things that may not leave us with such great wonder and awe, but might bring about more public acceptance or acknowledgement.
The way we want to spend our time should be reflected in our budget. Are you spending on things that take away from your ability to do the things that provide the answers to the questions above? When thinking about forming a budget, make sure that what you’re spending your money on gets you to that answer. If expensive cars, homes, clothing, and travel don’t get you to wonder and awe, reassess what does. If those things do, make sure to fit them in. Create a life where you get to spend your time, and money, in wonder and awe.